Monday, April 19, 2010

The BF’s Twilight thoughts

So as I’ve mentioned, the BF is reading Twilight. He tells me that he is kind of enjoying it, but there’s one thing that bothers him. Really bothers him.

He thinks that Robert Pattinson is the worst Edward Cullen that ever is or was.

I asked him to elaborate, and thus, what follows is my BF’s thoughts on why Robert Pattinson should never have been cast as Edward Cullen (all pictures and commentary complimentary of the BF, with quotes from the book in italic).

1. Greek God? No.

“He looked more like a Greek god than anyone had a right to.”

too much lipstickThat definitely does not describe R. Pattz. And he has too much lipstick on.

2. Jimmy Neutron

“I couldn’t imagine how an angel could be anymore glorious.”

jimmyneutron He looks like an alien, or a devil. Or Jimmy Neutron.

3. No contours

“I inched closer, stretched out my whole hand now, to trace the contours of his forearm with my fingertips.”

no forearms

Do you see any contours? Absolutely not.

4. Seriously disgusting and scrawny

“He lay perfectly still in the grass, his shirt open over his sculpted, incandescent chest, his scintillating arms bare.”

seriously disgusting scrawny sucks  thats hideous and spratp

Sculpted, incandescent chest. Look at his body dude, it’s not it!  He’s hideous, and his abs are spray painted.

5. Smiling is good

should be smiling like this

He should be smiling like this throughout the whole movie.

(The BF leaves me with these thoughts…) We can talk about how gay Bella is too…

For the comments: Do you agree with my BF’s thoughts? If you don’t, pick a fight with him.

4 comments:

splendidem said...

Alyssa, I love you and you know I will always go to Twilight movies with you (Imax this summer, oui?)

but

the man makes some very valid points. I don't know why I forgot to talk to him about this over the weekend. I really want to have a twilight convo with your BF. Preferably while at a bar. haha.

Vanessa said...

Now RPatz has grown on me in the movies but BF makes good points. But she wrote about a character who didn't exists so how do you find someone who doesn't exist for casting in the movie? Now that being said, they could have done better., oh well. 8)

Abi said...

Ha! I just give BF props for reading it! I understand where he's coming from but it's kind of hard to cast someone so perfect. Impossible, actually.
So even though he's not exactly like Edward Cullen from the book, I think he's a good choice nonetheless.

Momma Bender said...

Okay, Brent. Let's compare your abs to Rob's.